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A DEACON'S LIFE: SERVICE & COMPASSION
Archdeacon Steven Costa's Journey of Salvation

By Sybil Nishioka, Editor
[November 9, 2020, Chronicle]  On a misty Sunday morning in January, just before COVID-19 made its presence known in the islands, I joined Rae Costa, the Diocese's Business Manager and wife of our Archdeacon, Steven Costa, for worship at St. Elizabeth's in Honolulu.  

​While we waited for the service to begin, a middle-aged gentleman approached Rae asking for her husband Steve. His ruggedly handsome features hinted of a tough life written in the furrowed lines of his rich brown skin. His muscular build and broad shoulders were masked by the stiff lawn cloth of an Aloha shirt typical of Hawai'i's businessmen. He looked disappointed when he learned Steve was home ill, and departed soon after. Being niele, as reporters can sometimes be, I learned that his name was Ross, someone that Steve helped over a decade ago. I was already aware of the extensive outreach Steve was involved in, but hearing about Ross' story (shared further below) intrigued me. I wanted to learn more about Steve's ministry that could transform lives.  Little did I know then that Ross' story was just the tip of the iceberg to something much more profound and compelling. 
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​This article is about the Diocese's Archdeacon, the Venerable Steven Costa, whose face is familiar to many in the Diocese. As the Archdeacon, he assists at official services where the Bishop is the Celebrant, including those held on the neighbor islands. On any given Sunday, he can be seen at a service somewhere in the Diocese. As a deacon, he has dedicated his life to serving others in the community, and fills his time volunteering in countless outreach efforts.

But not many know about Steve's remarkable journey to a life of service and prayer. It's a riveting story ─ one that movies are made of ─ filled with drama, crime, guns, drugs, illness, despair, romance, hope, and salvation! It is an inspirational journey and a powerful example of God's grace and love overcoming adversity. It is also a deeply personal story of a man's battle with his demons, his unshakable faith, and an unyielding commitment to serve God and community. 

The following is a glimpse into Steve's journey. 

In the beginning...

​"I grew up in a criminal world. My father was friends with [people who] were well connected ‒ people of ill repute ‒ and I gravitated to the lifestyle. By the time I was 17, I had shipped my first 55-gallon drum of Mexican marijuana from Arizona, and was off and running. I moved some significant weight of illegal drugs. I used to collect money for the old gamblers and drug dealers, and I almost landed in prison for a very long time. It was a long time ago."
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It was the early fifties in Hawai'i when Steven James Costa was born.  The attack on Pearl Harbor and the end of WWII were fresh in the minds of people around the world. Hawai'i was still a territory, tourism was booming, and Hollywood was having a love affair with the islands. Smack dab in the heart of Honolulu was the community of Kalihi where Steve grew up.  He attended Kapālama Elementary and then moved on to Kamehameha School. 

Steve's Portuguese grandmother was a Roman Catholic who would Pray the Rosary, but his family did not attend church. Their "religion" was of a much darker more nefarious nature, revolving around illicit activities. Some of his earliest memories took place at illegal cock fights and other blood sports, and as he grew older, Steve was running drugs, guns, money, and living the high-life of a well connected criminal. After decades of a corrupt and indulgent lifestyle, there would be a high price to pay. Steve's life had become one of addiction and demons that would drag him into a long downward spiral. 

The climb back up

​​"I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, and God's timing is always right. I knew some people who gave me a chance and managed to turn my life around. [It was a] huge spiritual death, in letting go of the criminal  life."
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Change is rarely easy, especially when it comes to letting go of the only lifestyle you have ever known. Around the mid to late '80s, Steve moved further west to the suburbs and sought out recovery programs and groups, including Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). For many battling addiction, the road to recovery is difficult and oftentimes unsuccessful, and Steve's journey was no different. For years, he went in and out of the revolving door of sobriety and setbacks. Despite the falls, his desire to change kept him going, dusting off the cobwebs of old habits and picking himself up, time and again.  AA would be his introduction into a relationship with God, his saving grace, the power greater than himself that these 12-step programs are founded on. Interestingly enough, a nickname given to him by his AA peers was "the deacon," a name that would prove prophetic.

​"I started cleaning up from the inside out to get somewhat, pono. I read voraciously, spent hours in meditation, allowed the ʻuhane hemolele to slowly evacuate the wounds of the past, and heal my many insecurities and brokenness."
​For reasons he can't quite recall ("it was a long time ago") or perhaps divinely guided, he found himself at St. Timothy's Episcopal Church in Aiea. At the time, Fr. Vincent O'Neill was the priest there.  For over 30 years, Fr. Vince also served as a volunteer chaplain with the Honolulu Police Department, and would play an important role in Steve's recovery and spiritual growth. Here, not only did Steve find the love of God and community, but his future wife.

A new beginning

By the time 2000 rolled around and a new century was ushered in, it seemed that life for Steve had also turned a corner.  He worked hard to remain clean and sober, and went back to school to obtain his certification in Substance Abuse Counseling. His background made him uniquely qualified to serve as a compassionate and very effective clinician and counselor. 
"I used my drug dealing skills in a positive way, networking to acquire goods for the homeless, food stuffs, clothing, etc. Just kept doing what ke Akua put in front of me. ​"
​Working through Hina Mauka he began giving back to others the hope and care that he received during his recovery.  One of the places he was assigned to was the Institute of Human Services (IHS), the State's largest agency providing care and services to the homeless, founded in 1978 by Fr. Claude DuTeil, an Episcopal priest. This is also where Ross' story came to be:
​"Ross was the gentleman you spoke with at St . Elizabeth's Church. He was one of many very broken men and a few women who came through my door. It was quite a long time ago, so I'm not sure I remember the details, but what I recall is that he had been recently widowed, when his drug addicted wife died tragically from an overdose. He had been depressed, addicted and homeless for quite awhile, and had lost custody of his toddler son to [Child Protective Services].  Like so many who came to IHS for help, he struggled with his recovery. But somehow we connected, (therapeutic rapport) and slowly we managed to acquire one, then two days of not using. Sumner Street is a drug den. Drugs and alcohol are prevalent everywhere. We case managed him for everything from ID to Bus pass, to welfare assistance to eventually housing. We have stayed in touch, and here he is some 11 years later, clean and sober, reunited with his son, in his own place, living life on life's terms."  ​

The battle for his life... and love

Life was good.  Steve had found God, meaningful work, and a spark in his heart from a woman at St. Timothy's. He had come a long way from a life of taking ‒ to giving, indulging ‒ to nourishing, dark ‒ to light... and then... 
​​"I was diagnosed with bladder cancer in 2007.  It was a death of sorts, a horrible time of great pruning in my life. Things that I once thought were important needed to fall away.  I was entering the second half of life ‒ the container was too small, too centric ‒​ to hold the expanding content. It is done unto you."
Facing death can change a person in an instant.  For Steve, it was another battle for his life that put things into perspective.  Although he had met the love of his life, he waited to begin a serious relationship until he knew he was going to survive.  Finally, in October 2008, Steve married Rae Oshiro.   
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"It is an incredible blessing to find a woman who Loves Jesus, and supports me in all ways, and I her." - Steve

"He is my gift from God.  He has been an inspiration, my constant supporter in all I do, a teacher of being the hands and feet of Jesus, he takes care of me and pushes me to be a better person." ​ - Rae
Their mutual love and respect were borne through their deep faith and the struggles weathered together, especially when a different and even more deadly form of cancer returned in 2016. This time, Steve endured invasive surgery and a harsher cocktail of debilitating chemo drugs, "a slow-drip torture" administered weekly over the course of 10 months.
"But we are a resurrection people. If we die with Christ, we will be born again and live with Christ.  Today I celebrate life. It is Christ in me who lives." ​​

Heeding the call

"I didn’t just decide. If anything, I felt like Jonah, and wanted to run in the other direction. I wasn’t going to go to Nineveh and preach repentance to them. I was happy just doing my little service projects ‒ just leave me alone. But Fr. Greg (Johnson) kept bringing it up ‒ 'You’re doing the work already, why not see what it takes.' So, Fr. Greg approached the Bishop at [a Diocesan event] in 2009, I believe, which started the ball rolling."​
It was during the years of remission between his battles with cancer that Steve began studying and discerning a call to become a deacon. At the time, the Diocese was using the Na Imiloa program. (Na Imiloa has since been replaced by Waiolaihui'ia in the formation of both deacons and priests locally.) Steve recalls a number of mentors and role models:
"Long ago, I watched some of the first crop of locally formed Deacons. Uncle Ernie Uno comes to mind/heart. He was this strong yet gentle uncle figure, who exemplified service with humility. I was told heroic stories of his service with the 100th Battalion during WWII. But now he was this guy who stepped in whenever we didn’t have a priest to lead service, very unassuming, very matter-of-fact.  Much later, I met Aunty Deacon Nancy Conley, who took the time and effort to model deacon-like behaviors to me. She shared much of her life’s journey and lessons with me and made a huge impact.  Archdeacon Pat Reynolds also shared her diaconal wisdom with me, and so did Deacon Honey Becker.  ​Bishop Chang was someone who never really answered my questions.  Rather he would ask the question back to me and encourage me to find my own answer."
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In 2013, during the Annual Meeting of Convention's Eucharist service, Steve was ordained to the Diaconate by Bishop Robert Fitzpatrick. It was a joyous celebration that made his former nickname, "the deacon," a reality. (Pictured at right with Steve is Kaleo Patterson who was also ordained to the  diaconate as a transitional deacon, and now serves as the priest at St. Stephenʻs in Wahiawa.)

Soon after, in 2015, Steve officially retired from his job, but not from a life of service.  He continued to volunteer at numerous shelters and organizations, and to advocate for those in need.

On December 3, 2018 the Bishop appointed Steve to become the Archdeacon of the Diocese.  The work and title, which comes with no pay, and requires a heart of a missionary, calls Steve to:
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  1. Encourage and support the ministry of current vocational Deacons throughout the Diocese
  2. To share the ministry of Deacons throughout the Diocese encouraging the discernment of those called to ordination as vocational Deacons
  3. To advise the Bishop on the concerns and needs of the vocational Deacons
  4. To encourage outreach ministries throughout the Diocese
  5. To act as the "Jubilee Officer" of the Diocese.  

​"There is nothing I can say to encourage someone to become a deacon.  It is a calling.  It is not something I want to do, it is something I have to do – not out of obligation, but out of love for God and my neighbor."

A life of service

Today, Steve continues his good work that is nearly too numerous to count or keep track of. He is constantly on the go picking up and distributing food, clothing, and household goods, or testifying at government hearings on behalf of prison reform, affordable housing, unfair treatment of the homeless, and other social issues that may come up. He continues to volunteer at Wallyhouse (St. Elizabeth's Catholic Worker outreach program) to teach and train individuals cooking skills as part of their community service; work with addicts in recovery using AA’s 12-step program; listen to fifth-step confessions at Sand Island treatment center, and serves on boards of several non-profit organizations.

Right alongside of him is his wife Rae, who manages to find time around her demanding job to serve the community. On her days off, she can be found serving up meals, and the couple is also heavily involved in the Special Olympics program as coaches, nurturing not just those in need but those with special needs. Steve got involved in the Special Olympics program many years ago through Fr. Dale Burke who has a special needs child of his own.
​Asked how has COVID-19 affected his ministry? 
​"Everything has changed and nothing has changed.  The needs are still out there, just greater than ever.  I continue to go out each day and serve wherever God needs, with a mask on, watching my physical distance, and washing my hands often."
Most recently, the Bishop appointed Steve to be a part of The Cathedral of St. Andrew's clergy team to help them with their outreach efforts including other Central Honolulu congregations. 

We give thanks and praise to folks like Steve who live into their baptismal covenant every single day, with a heart filled with the love of God, and the spirit of Jesus reflected in every selfless act and every word of encouragement.

For those interested in seeking to learn more about becoming a deacon, contact Steve HERE. For those seeking help and information on substance abuse and mental health, visit the Stateʻs Alcohol and Drug Abuse webpage HERE, or the Federal governmentʻs SAMHSA webpage HERE.  
​​"Everyday I start my day with prayer, every evening I end my day with prayer, and everything in between is prayer in action.  It is me asking God to reveal to me the opportunities that are before me in this moment.  Is this a window of opportunity for me to forgive someone and be reconciled, or to express love and gratitude, or to break an unhealthy habit and develop a new and life-giving pattern of living?  God is the navigator of this journey I am on.  I simply continue to move in the direction he points."

Wisdom and life lessons from Archdeacon Steve:
​From Order to Disorder to Reordering of Life in Christ

​​Jesus was convinced and, ultimately, convincing of others that on the other side of death is life. Jesus says, “For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it.”  Here’s the best way for us to lose our life on Jesus’ terms: surrender. Surrender being god of your own life to Jesus Christ.  

The only way to live life is to allow Jesus Christ to live within us. This was St. Paul’s discovery. In his writings, St. Paul uses one particular phrase more than 85 times: “…in Christ.” He speaks of living his life “in Christ.”  “No longer” living life on others’ terms, or even on his own terms. He’s “no longer” doing that. St. Paul says repeatedly he’s now living his life “in Christ.”
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Live your life inside of Christ, who lives inside of you. Surrender your life, surrender your destiny, and take Jesus at his word: that life for you will come out of death. Your dying is the gateway to real life. You will face death many-a-time in this life. Life some days, some seasons, can be such a killer. And that is the very cross that Jesus is sharing with you.  Live your life inside of Christ who lives inside you, and you will absolutely, positively, undeniably, miraculously discover how life comes out of death.  

There’s two ways to know this to be true about Jesus’ way of the cross: how life can come out of death for you. For one, remember your own life experience. “A disciple asks Christ, ‘Teach me the law of the Holy Cross, the mystery of our redemption.’ To which Christ replies, ‘My child, you must learn this mystery by experience: Take up your cross and it will teach you all things.’”

 And so for you. Your cross is your teacher. Where can you recall how your breaking has been your making, how your dying has led to your rising, where life – real life, amazing life, abundant life – has come out of something that just killed you? 

This is not about resuscitation; this is about resurrection, the resurrection of your life. Draw on the miracle of your personal experience, how life, absolutely transformed life, has come out of death in your own past. That cycle will repeat: death and life; death and life.  

Secondly, if right now you can find no hope but only suffering and desolation in the cross you’ve been handed to carry – what is just killing you now– surrender your life and surrender your death, your many deaths, to Jesus. 

The weaker you are, the more powerless you feel, the more you will be able to understand this. You have nothing more to lose. 

Live your life inside of Christ who lives inside of you. He will embody you and enable you. This is Jesus’ way, the way of the cross.  And it’s within reach. It’s within Jesus’ reach for you. And that he does: reaches out for you, carries you, makes good on his promise that life, amazing life for you, that comes out of death. It does, and it will. 

Almighty God, whose Son our Savior Jesus Christ was lifted high upon the cross that he might draw the whole world to himself: Mercifully grant that we, who glory in the mystery of our redemption, may have grace to take up our cross and follow him; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen. 

When we can trust that God is in the suffering, our wounds become sacred wounds and the actual and ordinary life journey becomes itself the godly journey.

Until there has been a journey through suffering, I don’t believe that we have true healing authority, or the ability to lead anybody anyplace new. 

Being wounded, suffering, and dying are the quickest and most sure paths to truly living.

Healing means we are holding the space for our woundedness and allowing it to open our hearts to the reality that we are not the only people who are hurt, lonely, angry, or frustrated. We must also release the habitual aggression that characterizes our avoidance of trauma or any discomfort. My goal is to befriend my pain, to relate to it intimately as a means to end the suffering of desperately trying to avoid it. Opening our hearts to woundedness helps us to understand that everyone else around us carries around the same woundedness. . . .

​Perhaps what I have come to understand, finally, is that somehow I have become the one I have always wanted. This is why I do the things that I do. There is a fierce love that wakes me up every morning, that makes me tell my stories, refuses to let me apologize for my being here, blesses me with the capacity to be silent, alone, and grieving when I most need to be. You have to understand that this is what I mean when I say healing.

May all beings be seen, held kindly, and loved. May we all one day surrender to the weight of being healed.

With all this in mind, it is no wonder that Paul says what he does today: put on the Lord Jesus Christ. He speaks of the Lord Jesus, as one might speak of a sweater. But Paul isn’t speaking here of fashion or warmth, he is speaking of identity. While clothes can keep us warm, they also identify us. They tell the world who we are and to whom we belong, and so Paul says elsewhere you have stripped off the old self with its practices and have clothed yourselves with the new self. He goes on to say: as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.  In fact Paul speaks a great deal about clothing. Elsewhere Paul tells us to put on the armour of light; to put on imperishability;  to put on the whole armour of God; to put on the breastplate of righteousness; to put on the breastplate of faith and love, and a helmet of the hope of salvation. 
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I may not care about what I wear on my body, but we should all care about what we wear on our hearts. And what we wear on our hearts should be just as obvious to the world as what we wear on our bodies. Our T shirts may say Harvard, but our hearts should say Jesus. Our jeans may say Levis, but our hearts should say Jesus. Our clothing may say something about us, but so should our hearts, and that something should be the Lord Jesus Christ for in baptism we have all put on Christ and like any new set of clothes we should wear our baptismal clothing with pride, with dignity and with integrity.

In the news...

NAMIWalks Hawaii YourWay Virtual 2020

​​This is a great resource for anyone who wants to better their mental health. Information on tapping, nutrition & the gut, meditation, art and expression, living a purposeful life, self massage, and stories of hope. Do something for your mental wellness, give yourself a mini retreat and watch this.
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Community Voice:  Let’s Care For Our Brothers And Sisters Behind Bars - Every soul in Hawaii Nei, no matter where they live, is important for our survival.

Click on the image to read an article written by Steve that appeared in the Honolulu Civil Beat on May 3, 2020.

Editor's note:  Many thanks to Steve and Rae Costa for allowing us a glimpse into a very personal journey, with the hope that it may encourage others. 
Photos: S. Nishioka, M. Hino, S. Costa, Church Facebook pages
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